There comes a point in every writer’s life where you stare at a manuscript and think, I have rewritten this so many times I no longer know if it’s good, bad, genius, unhinged, or a war crime against literature.

That point, for me, is now.

After what feels like a million rewrites, false starts, plot overhauls, character changes, dramatic deletions, and several moments where I genuinely considered launching my laptop into the nearest body of water, Dust of Babylon is finally finished.

And yes, in true me fashion, I still hate it.

Not in the casual, “oh, every writer is self-critical” kind of way. More in the “I got this far, changed everything, fixed it, broke it again, fixed the broken fix, then decided I hated the entire thing anyway” kind of way.

This book has fought me from the beginning. It started as one idea, became another, mutated into something much darker, dragged Iraqi folklore into the desert, threw in British military horror, black humour, monsters, secrets, and enough dust, sweat, blood and bad decisions to choke a camel.

And somehow, despite all that, it exists.

That is the bit I’m trying to focus on.

Because perfection is a trap. Especially with a book like this. I could keep rewriting it forever. I could move a chapter, sharpen a scene, change a line, rethink a relationship, tweak the monster, question the pacing, decide the whole middle section needs setting on fire and starting again.

Again.

But at some point, the story has to leave my hands.

So that’s what I’m doing.

I’ve decided to stop wrestling with it, stop picking at every scar, stop convincing myself one more pass will magically make me love it. Dust of Babylon is going out into the world, whether I feel ready or not.

Maybe readers will love it. Maybe they’ll hate it. Maybe they’ll see all the things I can’t see anymore because I’ve been trapped inside this desert nightmare for too long.

But it’s done.

It’s finished.

It survived me.

And now I’m releasing it, closing the file, and moving on before I decide to rewrite the whole bloody thing again.

Dust of Babylon is coming.

God help us all.